7 Things You Should Never Stop Doing for Other People

I'll admit, I'm a sucker. I love cute things, I am obsessed with any and all things sentimental and I will remember a small act or sweet note much longer than I will remember or be grateful for an extravagant gift. So in the spirit of being ridiculously cheesy I thought I would share a few things that I love, whether I'm doing them, or they're being done for me, the message is still the same and very important. Enjoy.

1) NEVER stop saying "I love you"
          This is where I get really cheesy. I will never go to bed or say goodbye to someone I love without telling them that I do. The way I see it, every day is a gift and nothing is guaranteed so take the time to tell people how much you care because that might be the last thing you ever say to them.

2) Hug people when they need it.
           Regardless of if they're a crying girl upset over nothing, a man who refuses to show emotion, or someone who is just really happy and wants someone to share that with, hug them. Don't let them fight you. Hug them. Because even if they don't want to admit they're upset, the gesture on your part will make a piece of them feel better. Plus, who doesn't love hugs?

3) Don't ever underestimate the power of a good surprise!
            We all love surprises, if you say you don't, you're lying. You just don't like knowing you're going to be surprised and being kept out of the loop. So do it the right way and don't tell them, just surprise them! It doesn't matter what it's for, birthdays, anniversaries, or just because. Surprises are a great way of showing someone you care about them and it always brightens their day, everything is better unexpected.

4) Giving "Get Well Soon" baskets.
            This doesn't need to be over done, but if your loved one is feeling under the weather, swing by the Dollar Tree, get some medicine, tissues, candy and a good movie for them to enjoy until they get better. It's sweet and shows that you genuinely care about that person, especially if you're willing to go out of your way for them.

5) Sharing Secrets.
           Talk! There's nothing I love more than a deep heart felt conversation, (girly I know) but you can't say that you don't love them too! Tell me what you want to do with your life, tell me your secrets, explain something to me that's important to you, I don't care what it is, but talk. You'll be surprised at how far you get and how much closer you'll become. Trust me.

6) Be nice to strangers.
           You never know how you're going to affect someone's day. Smile at people, say hello, be polite, but be genuine. Care about everyone. Think about a stranger as someone with a family that cares about them, someone with a life, and not just someone you pass on the street, sometimes we become to self absorbed to notice those around us and you could really make a difference for someone else.

7) Encourage people.
            If you see someone struggling, encourage them. Doesn't matter what it is that they're having a hard time with, and you don't necessarily have to make a huge speech on the matter or anything, but just something small. A simple, "praying for you today," or "you're doing a great job" anything like that, people need reassurance. Plain as that. Help each other.

Above all, just be the type of person you would want your kids to come across, whether you have them or not. Be the type of person you would want to greet your parents in public, or just be the type of person you would want to encounter on a daily basis. Make a habit out of caring for others and see how far it gets you. I bet you'll be surprised. ;)

Good luck!
Love,
Kayla.

My Personal Letter to Girls from a "Broken Home"

Here's the deal. We all know we can't pick our family, and sometimes life deals you with a crappy hand  that you can't really control. That sucks, but what should you do? MOVE ON.

I might as well make a warning statement here that this post probably won't be the sweetest thing you'll ever read. But the group of girls addressed in this post includes myself as well. Refer to the introduction post and my comment about tough love, because here it is.

What is a "Broken Home"? This is a disgusting term used to describe a family in which only one parent is present. Honestly it infuriates me that these are even the words used in this situation, because in a lot of case scenarios only living with one parent is probably best for the kid in question anyway.

What I REALLY want to talk about is girls that use this as an excuse. I'm sure we've all heard the phrase, "daddy issues" and if you've ever used it, especially when referring to yourself in a serious manner you can just go ahead and slap yourself now. I mean that in the nicest way possible, honestly, but I don't feel bad for you. Get pissed all you want sweetheart, but I'm in that boat too.

Not having a dad around is not an excuse to be a raging psychopath. If anything, being mad at this dad character in your life should motivate you to do more with yourself. You aren't going to prove anyone wrong or make anyone regret what they did to you by ruining yourself. You're going to do it by slapping on some big girl panties and making someone out of yourself that everyone can be proud of, and that estranged father of yours can kick himself for not getting to know.

Don't know what I'm talking about? Here's some statistics for you, found on a website with the title, "A Fatherless Generation" ...obviously some just oh so brilliant people.

• 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes (US Dept. Of Health/Census) – 5 times the average.

• 90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes – 32 times the average.

• 85% of all children who show behavior disorders come from fatherless homes – 20 times the average.  (Center for Disease Control)

• 80% of rapists with anger problems come from fatherless homes –14 times the average.  (Justice & Behavior, Vol 14, p. 403-26)

• 71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes – 9 times the average.  (National Principals Association Report)

• 75% of all adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes – 10 times the average.

• 85% of all youths in prison come from fatherless homes – 20 times the average.  (Fulton Co. Georgia, Texas Dept. of Correction)

Does that sound like someone you would be proud to be? Does it make you happy that those are the stereotypes of people from these "broken homes"? No? Well it shouldn't. It should piss you off.

So what are you going to do about it? Continue to be upset and blame everything on the hand that life has dealt you? Use this as your excuse to be a less than mediocre version of yourself? Or let that motivate you to make a new name for yourself and for people like you?

I'm sorry but I hate that people who don't have a choice in the matter are already judged by society as soon as they have to write their parent/guardian on a permission slip. Don't give them a reason to think any less of you. Give them a reason to be proud of you. Not for overcoming a situation they think is awful, but for just being a good normal human being like everybody else. Because having less of a family doesn't make you less of a person.

Sorry for the rant, but if it motivated you at all then my job here is done, and if it didn't apply to you, then share it with someone or just wait for the next one! :)

Love,
Kayla.

Seven Things Your Ex is Not.

Good morning early risers! I trust you all had a fantastic morning after reading that last post, and if you chose not to participate that's fine, just know that I think you're no fun ;) .

So this post is going to address something almost all of us have had to deal with at least once in our life, ex boyfriends. Those are always fun right? Whether yours is crazy, locked up, or just a big jerk this will still apply to him. Take it or leave it, but here it is.

1) He is NOT your best friend.
         Now this one probably pissed some of you off, but hear me out. I did not say he can't be your friend, but he is not, under any circumstances, your best friend. It just doesn't work, regardless of why you ended things, you did. He may be an important part of your life for awhile but there comes a time when you have to cut the cord and let the kid go. If you want to talk to him every once in awhile then that's cool, no harm done, but don't go running to him every time you have a bad day. Not only will that make it hard for you to start and keep a new relationship, but it also makes you look slightly crazy.

2) He is NOT the greatest guy you'll ever meet.
          I hate this one, and I hear it from girls all the time, but despite how great you think this guy was, it didn't work for a reason. If he was the neatest thing you've seen since Nam, then that's cool and all,  but if he was suppose to be it, you wouldn't be thinking of him when reading this post about exes. The reality is that it didn't work for a reason, yes I know I already said that but I'm repeating it because it's important and the faster you accept that, the faster you will move on with your life. If that just totally ruined your day than think about it like this, if he was that great and it wasn't meant to be, then just imagine how awesome the right one is going to be. Trust me.

3) His family is NOT your family. 
          This one sucks, but we have gotten to a time where our boyfriend's moms actually like us, or their little sister or whoever and you grow pretty close to them. I understand that it's hard to let go of those bonds, but think about how awkward you would feel if you showed up one day and he was just kicking it at your house with your dad. Stop it.

4) He is NOT your excuse.
           Girls are the WORST about using what happened to them, or some random guy as their excuse to be hateful, or slutty, or whatever it is that they're doing that they feel the need to justify. He is NOT your excuse. As much as you may hate him now, he was all you wanted at one point so you have to deal with that and quit regretting things. It may not have turned out the way you planned but that doesn't give you the justification to be the next Lindsay Lohan. That's just trashy, and also very depressing because let's be real we all loved her when we were younger. Tragedy really.

5) He is NOT a conversation starter.
           Do NOT under ANY circumstances start a conversation with ANYONE about your ex boyfriend. Unless this girl is your bffl or whatever and you are locked away in a room somewhere crying about your feelings and no one else can hear you, he is not an acceptable conversation topic. Don't try to one up girls with your terrible boyfriend experiences and please do not ever talk to guys about him. They really don't care.

6) He is NOT dead.
           Remember this one when you start telling everyone terrible things about him. Because while you can avoid his angry texts and phone calls you may run into him somewhere in public and then you have to face what you did. Just have some respect, for yourself and for him, you cared once, so did he. Just don't bad mouth each other.

7) He is NOT going to hold you back anymore. 
             Here's a fun one. Whether he was controlling, rude, or whatever reason you had for getting out of that situation, you're out. Which means, you get to be you! You get to love yourself first, experience things first hand, and go have fun! Don't take this as an excuse to be a whore...refer to number four...but don't get in a huge rush for the next guy either. Be yourself for a little while, you'll be surprised at what you discover.

If this doesn't apply to you then I apologize, but stay tuned, there will be more posts you might enjoy!
As always, you're welcome ;) .

Love,
Kayla.

Five Things You Should Do Every Morning.

We all know that old saying, "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day," but why is that exactly? Because it's important to start the day off the right way correct? Well I've found that there are a few other things that help me start the day off with a smile, and a few less calories ;)

1)  Set your alarm early enough to give you a few minutes to just lay in bed. 
         Why? Laying in bed a little longer gives you a chance to think about your day, and of course adjust to the idea of getting up :) . While you're laying there, don't close your eyes and go back to sleep, do things like saying a quick little prayer to stay positive and open minded that day, to do your best at everything that you set out to do and to succeed at the things you need to conquer. Mentally plan out your outfit for the day, so that when you do finally get up you don't have to be as frustrated as some of us with the ever popular, "I have nothing to wear" dilemma that we all know is a lie.

2) Play music while you're getting ready.
           Spend some time in the morning dancing around to your favorite songs, it will put you in a better mood and it makes the every day routine a little more exciting. Of course, if you have roommates or live in an apartment like I do, you should probably try not to make them all hate you at the same time, so watch the volume level a bit, but don't crash the party.

3) Get dressed last.
            It honestly sickens me how many girls have a problem with their body and hate getting dressed in the morning. Get ready in your underwear! If it makes you uncomfortable at first that's totally normal, but spending those extra minutes with yourself, and your body will really help you appreciate it. I always feel best when I'm getting ready in the mornings because let's face it, that's when your makeup looks best, your hair is done, and you just feel confident. So be naked! Or close to it. Look at yourself and embrace who you are. You have to love your body to feel confident, and when you're confident, you're sexy, and trust me that's something everyone will notice. Don't believe me? Try it, just for a week or so. Keep an open mind. It's a great idea. Seriously.

4) Give yourself a few minutes to get it together before you leave.
            Having a few extra minutes before you have to rush out the door is always a good idea. This gives you a little while to make sure you have everything you need for the day, whether it be school work, your laptop, or a snack for later. Not to mention having that extra time helps you to be a lot less stressed out than someone running out the door at the last second.

5) Jam out on the way.
             I don't care who you are, where you're going, or what you're listening to, but you better crank it up. I'm not talking volume on 12 and tapping your fingers on the steering wheel, I mean belt your heart out. Pretend you're Katy Perry, or the Backstreet Boys, whatever your guilty pleasure is. Listen to something that makes you happy, and be a rockstar for five minutes while you drive to wherever it is that you need to be. This will put you in a good mood (and probably the people you stop next to at the red light too) then you have that great smile, you know, the "I just did something silly and no one knows so it's my own little amusing secret" smile when you get to where you're going, and those are just cute.


So you should try it, because it works for me, and I'm interested to see if it works for anyone else, if it does you should definitely let me know! If it doesn't, don't tell me because the optimist in me likes to pretend I'm a genius :) .

Good luck, and happy mornings!

Love,
Kayla.

Introduction.

I'm a firm believer that every girl has those times when she just needs to let out her crazy. Now hear me out, this should never, I repeat, NEVER, happen in public, or around anyone really. So that's kind of what this blog is about.

I've collected a few of my own tips and tricks to play in this little game called life, that I find either humorous, or really helpful, sometimes even both. So you'll thank me at the end.

This is basically going to be what every girl should hear, needs to hear, and doesn't want to hear. I do this out of the deep, warm, fuzzy part of my heart, really, but if it comes off as the hateful not so sweet part, let's just call that tough love. You're welcome.

Love,
Kayla.